A TEAM v B TEAM
Tales from last years match;Dave stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity, looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed. He was driving Dylan nuts. Finally exasperated Dylan says, "What's taking so long? Hit the fuc*ing ball!"
Dave answers, "My girlfriend Nicky is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot."
"Forget it, man," said Dylan, "you aint got a chance of hitting her from here!"
After losing her first ball on the fifth, Nathalie returned to the tee to hit a second. Nathalie creamed this second ball and looked up to see the ball honing in on big Nick Surname.
Indeed, the ball hit Nick, and he immediately clasped his hands together at his crotch, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in evident agony.
Nathalie rushed back to Nick and immediately began to apologize; "Let me help. I'm training in physical therapy and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd just allow me!" she told him earnestly.
"Ummph, oooh, nnooo, I'll be all right. I'll be fine in a few minutes," Nick replied breathlessly as he remained in the fetal position still clasping his hands together at his crotch. But she persisted, and he finally allowed her to help him.
Nathalie gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, she loosened his pants, and she put her hands inside. After a short massage she asked him, "How does that feel?"
To which Nick replied: "It feels great, but my thumb still hurts like hell!"
Dan the man: "Well, I have never played this badly before!
Alun: "I didn't realise you had played before, bud."
Gareth: "I'd move heaven and earth to be able to break 100 on this course,"
Billy: "Try heaven," advised Bill. "You've already moved most of the earth."
